It dawns on you as the battle tethers to an end and you retreat battered and bruised to your corner. It’s a rather painful realization. Far from a proud moment, the insight strikes at full force:
That QQ was my fault.
Not only was it my fault, but it was way over the top. I simply overreacted, and it is no one to blame but myself. Shitty moment indeed. It’s always nice when the noobishness, the QQ, the drama or the fail stem from someone else; to be in the Island of Absolute Right and rule it supreme, simply poking fingers at those who stand in the fire, troll or winds up the emo. But it’s not always someone else.
I for one tend to overreact to criticism, desperately trying to prove that in no way was I wrong and if so: it was not my fault. Of course I like to be challenged, so just cause I hate people telling me where I’m failing doesn’t mean I stay away from those situations. In fact, I seek them out (as proved by choice of career and things such as volunteering to lead raids….). This invariably leads to moments where I am the one flaming up the situation, the one that take things a bit too far. From not letting a discussion die out, to snapping at someone providing a suggestion at a really bad time. We all do at some point or another, but the real question is: what do you do afterwards?
Just say you are sorry
Sorry is a much used word (soz I pulld!), but a sincere apology is rarer to come across. In WoW where the stereotypical alpha male behaviour of “I’m right, fuck off!” (though often rephrased to take more space and in a more polite tone) is the start and end of many conflicts. It’s a tactic I have used to great success myself in PuGs and other fleeting player encounters. But, it doesn’t work when your supposed to meet them again tomorrow night, and the night after, and the night after etc… In such, I have found that a proper apology goes a long way.
Admittance to mistakes needs to be used sparingly (unless everyone is open about theirs), to not end up looking like one who makes errors all the time. But a whisper saying “Hey, sorry about being cross earlier” have for me invariably lead to nice conversations. After all, who don’t like being told that they were right?
Yeah, I’m sorry about the QQ
And if you were looking for some kind of miracle cure to remove the QQ or to get you out of trouble when your the QQ-master, I’m sorry to disappoint you. To offer such a simple solution as an apology, is perhaps redundant. But, have you ever seen an apology in AV? When did you last see one in trade? The emphasis on being professional gamers who have learned how to “l2p”, is leaving less room for trial and error. Less room for making mistakes, admitting to them and moving on. So, perhaps we should go granny on each others asses, and just say we’re sorry?